May 29, 2009

a deep sigh around the table


taken with nikon-f

i've just come back from a long trip.
while i've been trying to get back to my normal life, i was hit by someone anonymous's thoughtless comments left here.
they were filled with malice i thought, so i remove those.
or now i think i shouldn't have done that, because they told some kind of truth.
but it really hurt me.

they said that my english is terribly bad as i've lived in the u.s. for 9 years.
then it suggested that i should use some translating method and left a link to some web page.
i don't know exactly if 2 comments that hurt me were made by same person or not.
also i can't tell if they were made by a serious thought or just because he wanted to hurt me without any reason but pleasure, or it might have been for his business.
anyway i felt so sad when i read them.
i know that my english is not good, and  that's why i started this blog.
i've been trying to learn and improve my english all the time since i started living in the u.s..
to tell the truth, i'm still not confident with my english at all.
so could you imagine that blogging in english is very hesitating for me.
as it is, i still enjoy learning english at this place by blogging something i love the most in my usual life.

the anonymous guy ( or girl) told that he (she) is originally from the other country than the u.s. and his (her) native tongue is not english.
so his (her) english used to leave 2 comments was also bad.
i don't know if all these were true or just made up.
the most saddest thing made me feel very bad is this.
this person knows how people feel anxious and afraid to manage the language that is not native.
so i can say that the thing that hurt me most is not that i was told that my english is very bad ( because i've already noticed that), but the truth that such a sad person came by and left its malice here.

i'm so sorry that i've been telling you this deep and sad thought today.
i just wanted to share this instead of hiding.
i don't know if i was right that i removed those 2 comments.
anyway, thank you for listening to me.
i feel much better now.

btw, i've been considering how to make my usual life after i came back to home from a trip.
usually while i'm on a trip, i don't use a pc at all.
and that makes me feel so good.
originally i'm not a techy person and i've been thinking i should concentrate more on my real life for these months.
so, i might quit some of the activities in pc than my original japanese blog "flower child".
the more place i have to check in, the more time i have to use before a pc.
speaking of the cooperative photography website with my husband, that's o.k. because  i don't update that so often.
i really want to keep this place for my english study, but i can't exactly tell how i'm gonna do about it.
so, please don't worry that i'm terribly hit by this time's incident even though i quit here.

i'll tell you my dicision later.
see you soon.


May 7, 2009

white on the table

taken with hasselblad-500c

today i don't have much time, but i wanted to stop by to avoid long absence here.
so very quick and simple post today.

i love white things on my table.
especially white and antique silver.
they go quite well each other, i think.
 
i feel fresh air is blowing on the table.
can you feel it?

have a good day, guys :)

(today i'll skip a love letter 'cause this post itself is exact a love letter.
also i'm sorry that i don't reply to your lovely comments for me.
i really really appreciate all your kind and warm words.
thank you, thank you all :))